Ask the Experts by Training & Treatment Innovations, Inc. (TTI)

Q: Can you tell me about the Mental Health First Aid (MHFA) training sessions that will be offered through The Family Center this month – who should attend and what can we expect if we do?

A: Just like First Aid and CPR training provide people with the skills to help someone experiencing a physical health crisis, Mental Health First Aid is a course, designed for lay people, to provide the skills needed to reach out to a person experiencing a mental health crisis. The Youth Mental Health First Aid course, scheduled for two mornings in late August, is designed for adults who work with young people, ages 12-18 — teachers, coaches, leaders of faith communities, social workers, and other caring citizens. Anyone is welcome to attend.

You are more likely to encounter someone — friend, family member, student, neighbor, or member of the community — in an emotional or mental crisis than someone having a heart attack. Youth Mental Health First Aid teaches a 5-step action plan to offer initial help to young people showing signs of a mental illness or in a crisis, and connect them with the appropriate professional, peer, social, or self-help care. Read more: Learn the Skills Needed to Reach Out to a Person Experiencing a Mental Health Crisis

Ask the Experts by Veronica McAtee

Q: My daughter is scared to use public restrooms and often refuses.  I think it’s the loud sounds that bother her.  She has a language delay so it’s hard for me to truly understand what is bothering her.  I keep reassuring her she’ll be ok, but that doesn’t seem to help.  I know it’s important for her to use public restrooms, so how can I help her overcome this fear without stressing her out too much?

A: This is a common fear for children.  Public restrooms are loud, and the sounds are often unpredictable. Some restrooms have automatic flushers that go off when the child is using the toilet and one or two experiences like that might be enough for a child to avoid them altogether.  However, the more that you avoid the sounds, the bigger the fear becomes.  Be prepared when you out and proactively visit different types of bathrooms to get used to the sounds. Tell your child using simple language that you are going to just visit the bathroom and walk in and then leave after a short time without requiring her to go in the stall. Praise her for staying calm and being brave. The more she is exposed to the sounds, the easier they will be to handle. If you practice this when she doesn’t need to use the restroom, she might be calmer and more relaxed.  If you’re using a toilet with an automatic flusher cover the sensor with something and remove it when it’s time to flush. You can also tell your child to cover her ears before you flush and stand outside of the bathroom stall so that she is able to tolerate the sound from a distance. Set small goals along the way and reward your child when she is brave and accomplishes those goals.   

Read more: Helping Your Child to Overcome Fears

Ask the Experts by Sara Martin

Q: I’m concerned about keeping up with my daughter’s language skills during summer break. I am always hearing about the summer slide and I don’t know what I should be doing. 

A: This is a great question! During summer, there are many ways to keep up with language skills. Many of these suggestions can be done year-round.

First, ramp up the reading. Visit the library and check out new books often. Read with your daughter everyday. If she’s old enough to read, take turns reading. At least 20 minutes a day is recommended!

Read more: Keeping Up with Kids Language Skills During Summer Break

Ask the Experts by Charmaine Johnson-Fuller  

Q: I work from home and struggle with summer break and maintaining a good balance. How can I create a schedule that supports my business and family over summer break? 

A: Summer vacation can be a stressful time for parents that work from home.  

How can you make summer vacation a win-win for your business and family? Below are the 5 things that will help create a winning formula to support your summer fun.  

1. Goals – What are your goals for your family and business over the summer? Knowing these will keep you from getting caught up in parenting and business FOMO (fear of missing out). 
   

Read more: Summer Break Doesn’t Have to be Stressful

Ask the Experts by Dr. Jennifer Mertz

Q: Why does it seem like kids are getting braces earlier and earlier these days?

A: The American Association of Orthodontists recommends children are seen by an orthodontist by the age of 7. This is not so we can put braces on your child even earlier. We recommend some form of orthodontic treatment in only a fraction of the young kids we see. Some problems may be easier to correct if they are found and treated early.

Around the age of 6-7, some of the adult permanent teeth have come in and so have the first set of adult molars, “the six-year molars”. This initial examination helps to identify any concerns the parent may have for their child. Your orthodontist may suggest early interceptive treatment to normalize the eruption of permanent teeth, to reduce the risk of dental trauma, to correct harmful habits, or assist in jaw growth.

Read more: The ability to smile with confidence during the childhood years can make a valuable difference

Ask the Experts by Kristen DeVooght and Dorothy Heitjan

Q: What are some practical strategies parents can use to build their child’s language and interaction skills?

A: Language is the foundation of learning.  Development of language occurs in the pivotal years between birth and 5 years of age. The role parents and caregivers play during this time is monumental.

There are three main strategies parents can use to bolster their child’s language and vocabulary skills. Read more: The Importance of Parent-Child Language Interactions

Ask the Experts by Det. Ryan Schroerlucke

Q: I monitor my son’s social media accounts periodically and some of what I see on his feed makes me uncomfortable. He says I’m overreacting. How can I help him understand the difference between sarcasm/joking and cyberbullying?

A: The definition of bullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior among school-aged children that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. The behavior is repeated, or has the potential to be repeated, over time. Cyberbullying uses technology to degrade, harass or humiliate another person or group of people and makes the victim(s) feel as though everyone in their peer group knows what is going on.

The problem with kids thinking they’re being sarcastic or “just joking” on social media and through technology is that it can be interpreted different ways by different people. If your son thinks what he sees (or does) is meant as a joke, but the person targeted takes what is written as literal and harmful, it is bullying. Over time, and with repeated targeting, the victim is more likely to skip/drop out of school, get lower grades, turn to substances or alcohol and show poor self-esteem. Read more: Understanding Cyberbullying

Ask the Experts by Lori Warner, PhD

Q: My daughter’s school has an online “parent portal” where I can see all her grades and assignments. How often should I be checking it? What should I do if I see something is missing?

A: Some schools limit updates and give families and students guidelines of how best to use this tool. Helping your daughter take ownership of and responsibility for her own learning experience and relationships with teachers is crucial. When we swoop in and “handle” something for our children, rather than discussing, supporting, and coaching them through handling it themselves, we communicate to them that we don’t think they can do it. The exact frequency of checking the portal is up to you, but multiple checks per day is likely excessive and will lead to stress for you, your daughter, and her teachers.

Read more: Smart Parenting

Ask the Experts by Jeff and Debra Jay

Q: My dad is a great guy and has always been a good father. He’s also been a big drinker as far back as I can remember. It never really concerned us much, to be honest, but he’s older now and the drinking is taking him away from us. We can all see it. We’re all worried. I’ve talked with my mom and brother about it, and, together, we asked our dad to cut back. He did for a week or so, but now he drinks like he always did. We read your book, “No More Letting Go,” which helped us understand that alcoholics lose the ability to choose and they push away help. That is exactly what we are living. I love my dad. I want to help him with dignity and respect. What road should we take forward?

A: We’re glad you reached out with this question, because how you choose to help a loved one suffering from addiction is very important. It defines who you are as a family and determines the quality of the journey you take together. It’s not just ambushing someone into accepting help. That approach can end in disaster, even if the addicted person agrees.

Intervention well done should be thought of as a spiritual negotiation that preserves family relationships, is a message of love, is choreographed to get the right kind of results, builds a family team that knows how to support the addicted loved one before, during and after treatment. When done properly, 85% of people agree to get help that day. Most of the other 15% accept help in a few days or weeks.

Read more: Planning helps foster successful intervention with loved ones

Ask the Experts by Evon N. Foster, LMSW, IMH-E®

Q: Is a healthy attachment relationship necessary for the development of infant/toddlers?

A: Optimal development (physical, cognitive, social and emotional) of infants/and toddlers through nurturing, protective, secure and stable relationships with parents promotes readiness to learn.

You may wonder how? Parental nurturing styles and response to young children is impacted by life stressors, lack of support, parent’s history, mental illness and substance abuse. Without a secure relationship, children can become insecure, anxious and disorganized. These are children who become an overwhelming part of the mental health and juvenile system.

Read more: Bonds Formed in Children with their Parents Have a Tremendous Impact